Tuesday, 26 August 2008

fooking rabbit

I'm a bit of a sucker for animals and we started off with 2 kittens, one bogged off haven't seen her for years when she was about 2 and one sadly died. When chip died we went to the cats protection and got a rescue cat, Hamish. In between we got a puppy, which I've always wanted. I called her Trump because I found the name in the book about Parsons terriers and also my auntiy said 'you can't call her that' so I did.

I had a desire for chickens so we got some rescue chickens. In a suburban garden with very little room thats not a good idea, however the eggs were a bonus but having a stinking cess pit at the end of the garden wasn't fun and I felt a bit sorry for them being in inches of sludge so I let them out. Freedom. Hens like to scratch don't they? yep there goes the lawn.

One by one the rescued battery hens popped their clogs and so the chicken pen was redundant. Then mother (thats me) decides to get a couple of guinea pigs. Along comes spike and woolley. Cute little guinea pigs. They were in the house for a time but when they got big enough they went in the garden where the chickens used to be. The neighbours also said they could have their rabbit so I stupidly said yes. What trouble could a rabbit be?

Her name is or was sophie but we renamed her Primrose, how ironic. The fence around the pen is about 2 foot high if that. She kept jumping over it. So I extended it using trellis and netting. She gets under the netting and out. I've just spent about 10 or 15 quid on primroses to adorn the drab garden after winter (and yet another shite summer the year before)and the wee shite scoffs all the beautiful flowers. I'm gutted. Now you may think thats a bit harse to be gutted over some flowers but I wouldn't go the asda or wherever and spend 10-15 quid on cabages for the little furry friends to eat now would I? The most they would ever get is perhaps a cheapo cucumber or some greens if they are lucky.

There is also Hopes plastic wendy house in the pen and we had to shut the door as the rabbit was in there digging an escape to next door but then we found out it was jumping through the little holes in the doors so Bruce had to load the holes up with wood to stop it getting into the wendy house. What a bloody palava. The end of the garden looks like Alcatraz.

There is also a little sliding gate in the pen which I use to get in and out to clean out and stuff I put half an old fire guard leant up against the small sliding gate to stop the rabbit jumping over that. But it found a really small gap and proceeded to get through there too. I had had it with the wabbit. The final straw was when it ate a gladiolii I had planted as a bulb last year that my dad gave me and waited all year for it to bloom. It was nearly there and everyday I would check it's progress in anticipation of what colour it was going to be (I don't get out much). One morning the rabbit had escaped again and the gladiolii had been scoffed. That was it.

So I shipped it off to grans 150 or so foot garden. Loads of space, loads of long grass to hide in. You give a creature a bit of freedom and it just takes the piss eh? because this pesky rabbit wasn't content with my grans 150 foot garden oh no it wanted next doors 150 foot garden.

The son of the house catches it to protect it from the cat and gives it us back!!! So I take it back home again back to the pen. A few days later, in the pen, I see what looks like a bag full of hardcore dumped in there. I am confused? who in gods name put that there?

I ask his nibs if he knows anything about it and he doesn't so I start locking the gate thinking some chav has been in and dumped it, some considerate chav though because it's laid out all level not just in a pile!

Next time I'm in the pen cleaning the wretched creature out I found a hole behind the hutch with hardcore debris at the entrance so I have a gander into the hole which is only about 3 inches by 6 inches and the 2 foot long spade I'm using to clean out the hutch with I delve into the hole and it disappears and so does half my arm. I swing the spade side to side and it comes into contact with earth about 10 or so inches apart. The wee shite has been playing bunny 'the great escape' under the path!!

I used to be a devout veggie and animal activist but am thinking bunny pie might be quite nice!!

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